Everyday Defects
by Mie-chan
Summary: A mysterious red light surrounds some of the people of the Book, sending them into Miaka's world. And what's this?Tasuki, why don't you remember Miaka?Oh well, it sounds serious. Miaka haters unite! For, if you review, very nasty things will happen to her
1. Defect One: Corn Flakes and Assorted

**Disclaimer: **I do not own any of Watase-sensei's characters, nor the characters of any other title I wish to borrow. I do however own the few original characters in this fic that have never been in a Fushigi Yuugi chapter or episode.

_Mie-chan: _This is Mie-chan in my first ever fan fiction!!! . Along to help me is my best friend, Shinju-chan! - This is a story about some of the people from Fushigi Yuugi, trapped in Miaka's world, trying to look normal and deal with everyday stuff. ; Enjoy!!!

_Shinju-chan: _Stop it with the wussy crp. Basically, we'll both be working on the fic, so whenever there isn't any indentation it means Mie-chan is writing, but indentation means that I'm typing. (Mie Note: Gods Shinju-chan, you type so slow.)

**Corn Flakes and Assorted Breakfast Cereals? **

His eyes fluttered open a few times before he was fully awake. A throbbing pain in his head made him grit his teeth; he would have this headache for a while. There was something on his face, he lifted it off. It was a box. He could dimly make out some weird squiggles and a green rooster on it.

He got up slowly, wincing as a sharp pain shot through his leg, but it was only a short-lived pain. He walked a few paces and bumped into something, falling down. It was dark, and thus he could not see. (What's with this wussy "thus" crp?!? Woah... déjà vu.)

A beam of light appeared as a tall figure came into sight, "Onii-chan, get the Corn Flakes while you're down there, 'kay?" came a voice from beyond the light, "I'm starving."

"Didn't you just eat?" this was the tall figure, now revealed to have sandy blond hair.

"Yeah, but I'm starving!"

Then a bright light flickered on in the room, the young man then noticed the other young man sprawled out on the ground, hand on head.

"Oh my god, there's a thief in the pantry! Miaka, there's a thief in the pantry! Armed robbery, call the police, our lives are in danger!!!" He ran off screaming like a little girl. (Mie Note: Kind of like a pansy, or a wuss... he could be a "pansy-wuss"!) (Shinju Note: I shall now forever call him: Man Who Screameth Like a Little Girl.)

"Hey," the orange haired dude said, "I'm not a thief... well not right now. Anyway, I just woke up here!"

"Oh my god, it's a hobo!"

"I'm not a hobo, ya bastard!"

"What did you call me?"

"B-A-S-T-A-R-D! Ya got that, bastard?!?"

The young, sandy haired man ran away bawling, "Miaka, he's being a meanie!"

"Umm, onii-chan, aren't yousupposed to be the _older_ sibling?"

"Oh, right... heheheh..." he sweatdropped, "But what are we gonna do about the hobo?"

"I'm not a hobo! My name's Genrou! Got that through yer thick scull?!?"

"Genrou, ne? Freakin' weird name if you ask me."

"Well I didn't!"

"Umm, onii-chan, can I just have the Corn Flakes already? And is that Tasuki? What's he doing in our pantry?" She trailed off at the sight of him standing on top of the only box of Corn Flakes left, "My Corn Flakes!"

"So, what are you doing here, Tasuki?" He stared at Miaka over the bowl of cereal he was attempting to eat (without milk).

"How did ya know?" he asked bluntly.

"How did I know what?"

"That I'm one-a th' shichiseishi."

She blinked, "You're Tasuki, I'm Miaka: Seishi and miko. That's how."

It was Tasuki's turn to blink, "Yer th' miko?!?"

"Yeah."

"Where are th' other seishi?"

"I don't know."

"Don't we need 'em?"

"No, we already summoned Suzaku."

"WHAT?!?"

"Yeah, you know, the whole everybody dying thing?"

"I'm dead?!?"

Keisuke then had an idea, "Yes, this is the afterlife. Strange, ne?"

"Oh my gods, I'm dead!"

"No," Miaka glared over at her brother who was snickering uncontrollably, "You're not dead, onii-chan is just a liar."

"Better than being a hobo," he said under his breath.

A blue-haired man groaned softly as he blinked in the light. He was sprawled out on some sort of tub made out of a slick, white material that glinted brightly.

He moaned softly, head throbbing as if he had been drinking heavily, "Some hang-over, ne?"

He got up slowly.

In the corner of the room sat a strange-looking bowl.

Stumbling towards it, he noticed it was full of the cleanest water he had ever seen.

He glanced around. Whoever used this water wouldn't notice if he took a little sip. He lowered his head into the bowl, not noticing the door open.

A few minutes earlier in the kitchen...

"Umm, excuse me for a minute; I need to use the restroom..." Miaka said.

As she opened the bathroom door she let out a high-pitched scream. In the room, there was a blue haired man hunched over the toilet, "Oh my god, there's a man drinking out of the toilet!"

Tasuki and Keisuke looked up in the direction the scream had come from.

"Miaka!" exclaimed Keisuke.

"Gluttonous Monster!" exclaimed Tasuki. Keisuke whapped Tasuki over the head, then ran towards Miaka, Tasuki following him.

"Kouji? What th' hell?" Then orange hair met blue hair as the two friends did that strange little dance they do every time they meet.

"Genrou, what're ya doin' here?" asked Kouji.

"I could ask ya th' same question, Kouji. There was some weird red light an' I was in a dark room with boxes n' stuff."

"You mean the pantry," said Miaka, drooling slightly at the thought of all that food.

_Next on Everyday Defects: _

_Miaka: Tasuki? Why don't you remember me? Oh, umm... special appearances and er... stuff. People from Tasuki's, or should I say GENROU's, past. Join me for the next episode: "The Tasuki Mattress?"_

Mie Note: This next episode contains some Monty Pythonism...


	2. Defect Two: The Tasuki Bed Mattress?

**Disclaimer:** Although I wish I did, and it would be very convenient, I do not own Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Cries I wanted it for Christmas, but didn't get it. ;;

**The Tasuki Mattress? **

"What th' hell?!? How'd these people get inside this box? They couldn't possibly fit!" exclaimed Tasuki as he stared wide-eyed at a black box with moving pictures on it.

"Relax," said Keisuke, "It's a TV. Kinda like a book, but with pictures instead of words. Anyway, there aren't any people in there, they're simply filmed and copied." Tasuki and Kouji stared blankly at him. He sighed, "Nevermind."

Over breakfast, Miaka and Keisuke interrogated the pair, "So, how did you get here?" asked Keisuke.

"Some weird red light, then, bang! I was in a dark room, or as you say 'pantry.'"

"Why don't you remember me?" Miaka sniffed. They had been through so much together, and yet he didn't remember her, "I mean, we traveled together for months; you offering to fry me with your tessen, and me eating all the time. I really did miss you, but even more, I missed the wonderful Chinese cuisine."

"You missed food more'n _me_?!? I mean, I don't say I remember you 'r anythin', but if ya did miss food more'n me, I don't think I even want t' be yer friend."

"I remember ya," Kouji stated bluntly.

"Y- you do?" Miaka went all bubbly eyed and chibi, "That makes me so... HAPPY!!!"

Then there was a clash of thunder and green and red light appeared, momentarily blinding everyone.

"Ouchies, that hurt,"came a voice from the ceiling, "Shinju-chan, you need to learn how to teleport better, ceiling fans don't make good landings." Everyone looked up, with the exception of Tasuki, who was battling to remove a teenage brunette from completely suffocating him. "But then again, I'm pretty sure you're happy sitting on Tasuki-san's face."

The short blonde somehow managed to disentangle herself from the blades of the fan, wobbling slightly after being whirled around several times. "Next time, please oblige in leaving your fan off." She received many blank stares, except for Tasuki who was turning blue because a certain brunette was strangle-hugging him.

"Oh," said the blonde, prying her friend off the fiery redhead, "I'm Mie and that's Shinju. I hope you can forgive my friend, she has a little bit of an obsession with Tasuki-san, or should I say: COMPLETE WORSHIP!" She received more blank stares.

"Um," Miaka said tentatively, "How do you know about us?"

"Hm?" it was Shinju's turn to answer, "Oh, we know _everything, _except dancing, we don't dance." She squeezed Tasuki harder and he let out a strangled cry and turned a deeper shade of purple.

"Shall we demonstrate?" Mie asked. Not waiting for an answer, she grabbed Shinju, gripping both of the brunette's hands in her own. They danced around stupidly, knocking down various objects as they went, and finally, they "gracefully" ran into Tasuki, knocking him over, while giggling uncontrollably.

"See?" they chorused, "We don't dance." Everyone else sweatdropped.

"I can kind of tell," Tasuki managed to say from underneath Shinju and Mie.

Mie hopped off Tasuki, but Shinju stretched out on her seat and lay down on top of him, pinning him down.

"What th' hell 'r ya doin'?!?" he asked struggling and failing to get up.

"Mmm," Shinju said, "just like a mattress: Soft and firm." Everyone else sweatdropped.

"Uh, Shinju-chan, I wouldn't do that if I were you, Tasuki-san has a tessen, and well, barbequed Shinju-chan doesn't sound very appealing..." she trailed off, noticing not only that Shinju wasn't listening, but she was, in fact, asleep and snoring peacefully.

Tasuki had decided to take a nice, long walk, A.K.A., get away from his brunette of a stalker. He paused for a while, and as soon as he was sure that he wasn't being followed, he sat down in the shade of a nearby tree.

Then, for the second time that day, something heavy and alive landed splat on his face.

"Agh! Who th' hell? If that's Shinju then yer toast, literally!" The figure got off of him quickly, dusting off her skirts. It wasn't Shinju; it was a girl with black hair made into two buns.

"R- Reirei?!?" Tasuki gasped in surprise. "I thought you were dead. So how...?" he trailed off as she ran forward and hugged him tightly around the waist.

"I- I was saved, at the last moment," she said.

"How?"

"Well, I'll tell you..."

Suddenly a chorus of people came from no where, singing, "She's going to tell, she's going to tell..." They kept on singing until Tasuki scared them away with his tessen.

"So how are you alive?" he asked after the annoying chorus had left.

"Well, it turns out I was never really dead, I slowly made my way out of the grave by eating the dirt. Once I was out, an old woman found, and took care of me, slowly nursing me back to health. I was living with her until some strange red light appeared and took me away. After that I think I lost consciousness. When I woke up, I was in a tree; then I fell out and landed on you."

Tasuki stared at her, then he awkwardly said, "Ano... er, sorry 'bout th' whole burying ya thin'... umm... wait, did ya say ya _ate_ th' dirt?"

"Uh, yeah.""That's just disgusting!" She looked at the ground; embarrassed, "Er, no disrespect 'r nothin'. I'm just glad yer alive!" They embraced again, tighter this time, Reirei crying onto his shoulder.

"Tasuki-kun!!!" yelled a near-by voice. Tasuki winced as a short brunette hugged him around the waste from behind.

"Ano... Genrou, who is that?" asked Reirei, looking slightly discontented at the sight of a possible "rival."

"This, is er... this is Shinju, she seems to be obsessed with me," he shuddered as she hugged him tighter saying, "My Koi!"

_(Shinju Note: This means "love" or "fish" in Japanese, you guess which one I'm using.)_

"Get th' hell offa me, ya damn freak! An' stop callin' me yer "koi", I'm not a freakin' fish!" he said pushing the obsessed monkey away from him. (Mie gets whapped on the head Shinju Note: I'm not a monkey!)

The three of them made their way back to the apartment; Tasuki arguing with Shinju about whether or not he was her koi, while Reirei just stared at them looking both desolate and melodramatic.

As they reached the apartment building, Kouji walked out, "I've been lookin' for ya, where th' hell were y-" he stopped short as he caught sight of Reirei. "Reirei!" he exclaimed, grabbing her in a tight hug, "How 'r ya... I thought ya were dead."

"I'll tell you later," she said, "Right now I'm hungry." Her stomach agreed with her, growling enthusiastically.

_Next on Everyday Defects:_

_Kouji: Well, looks like there'll be some more people: Monkie and that other Tasuki lover... sheesh, I don't see what's so good about Gen-chan_

_(whap both Shinju and Reirei hit Kouji over the head with their fists)_

_Kouji: Well, join us for th' next chapter of Everyday Defects: "The Sky is Blue and so are You? Where the hell do they get these names?_

Mie note: If you don't review, I may stop posting... please review, onegei.


	3. Defect Three: The Sky is Blue and so ar...

The Sky is Blue and so are You?

Tasuki rolled over slightly in his sleep. "Damn women," he murmured into his pillow.

Miaka was drooling all over her pillow and saying things like, "Iie, ramen, come back," or, "Really, all this for free?"

Everyone was sleeping peacefully, except for the blue-haired figure perched upon the roof like a cat.

"What is this place, no da?" he asked, smiling despite the fact that he was helplessly lost in a strange place he had never seen before, where no one could help him.

A small, white cat poked its head out from one of the folds of the pony-tailed man's strange cloths, "Nya!" he (the cat) said, rubbing his head against the man's fingers.

"Tama-neko, what should we do?" The cat mimed jumping into the large hat the man was wearing. "Ah," he said as he slipped into his hat, muttering a few words, and then he vanished.

"Morning, morning everyone!" sang a cheerful voice, "It's time to get up." Mie stomped over to where her no longer asleep friends were.

"Five more minutes, please," begged Shinju.

"Not on my grave, you won't. Anyway, for you, five more minutes means until three in the afternoon!" Shinju grumbled as she sat up, blinking sleep from her eyes. She then realized that the only other person in the room was a certain orange-haired bandit.

"Shun'u-kun- hey, I know a girl named Shun'u," she said, getting totally lost and forgetting what she had been planning (Mie Note: It's true, every time Shinju-chan says "Shun'u" she gets all weird and her eyes glaze over as she says, "Hey, I know a girl named Shun'u.")

"Huh...?" Tasuki obviously hadn't been listening. "What did ya say?"

Shinju didn't answer, she had snapped her out of her weird Shun'u thingy (Shinju Note: "Shun'u thingy?!?") and she returned to automatic "glomp mode."

"Ack! Get offa me!" He tried in vain to pry off the chibi-eyed fan-girl- only Mie can do that.

Several minutes later, everyone was seated at the table eating cereal (Tasuki's and Shinju's without milk), when a loud crack sounded and something blue landed on top of Mie. That something blue was heavy... and... ALIVE!!!

"Mhhph, geph pha mph!" (translation: Hey, get off of me!") Mie tried to say, though it must have been very hard to speak through a solid object as heavy as a human.

"Gomen, no da. My landings still need training, no da." Everyone stared at the blue haired man who was just getting off of the now-squished Mie ("Heheheh, little stars round' and round'. What pretty colors I see.")

"Oof, you're a lot heavier than you look, Chichiri," said Mie, dusting off her cloths.

He blinked, "How did you know my name, no da?"

Everyone sweatdropped at the memory of how the "terrible two" had told them that "_Oh, we know everything. Except dancing, we don't dance._"

"It's a long story," said Keisuke.

"Iie, it's not," said Shinju.

"Well, we'll leave it for later then..." Everyone filed into the kitchen in alphabetical order. (Shinju Note: WHAT?!?) (Mie Note: I couldn't resist insane giggling)

After everything had been explained, they started to create theories as of why Tasuki didn't remember Miaka.

"Maybe it's amnesia, no da," said Chichiri. "I once knew a person who had amnesia, nice person, but forgot everything five seconds after it happened, no da."

"That's short term memory loss," said Miaka.

"Or senility," said Mie.

"I'm not senile, I'm only nineteen!" Tasuki said, looking angrily down at Mie.

"I never said you were; it's just a possibility."

"Okay, putting that aside. Tasuki, tell us what you can remember, starting with the most recent events," said Keisuke.

"Well there was this weird red light light, before that I was at Mt. Reikaku, before that it was th' whole thing with Anzu an' 'Chiri..." everyone stared at him.

"You remember Chichiri and you don't remember _me_?!?" Miaka was practically in tears.

"Go on, no da," said Chichiri.

"Well, before that was th' ol' boss dien', an' before that was th' thing with Reirei an' th' tessen..." everyone stared at him again, "What?" he asked, genuinely confused.

"You don't remember summoning Suzaku, no da?!?"

"Iie," he said, "Wait, we summoned Suzaku already?!?"

"Hai, no da! Whay can't you remember no da?!?"

"Tasuki-kun has amnesia," said Shinju. Everyone blinked.

"How do you know?" asked Reirei.

"Like I said: 'We know _everything'_."

"Then why didn't ya tell us?!?" asked a very P.O.'d bandit.

"Well, you never asked," said Mie, coming to her friend's rescue.

"That's right, anyway, now that you know; figure out how to get his memory back!"

"I thought you knew everything, no da," said an irritated monk.

"It probably has somethin' ta do with dancin'," said Kouji.

"Well, at least one of you has brains," said Mie, "Of course it has to do with dancing, otherwise we'd know!"

"So, Tasuki-kun, may I have the first dance?" Shinju glared at Reirei who was fluttering her eyelashes innocently at the orange haired bandit. Kouji made gagging sounds behind her back.

"What's wrong, Kouji-san," an almost concerned Mie said.

"Nothin', jus' th' obvious flirtation an' jealousy tha's goin' on here."

"You mean like your crush on Reirei-chan?" Now, if this was a manga with beautifully drawn pictures by Watase-sensei, there would be a frame fully devoted to depicting Kouji with one of those "bull's-eye" arrows going straight through his heart. "Ara, I guess I hit a soft spot, huh."

Several hours later, Tasuki had very sore feet.

"Teme, Shinju, if yer gonna help me, don't step on my feet! Gods, I'd be better off dancin' with an onii," Shinju whapped him on the head with her fist.

"Well, it's true, you're a horrible dancer," Mie said matter-of-factly.

"Urusai yo!!!" She growled menacingly at Mie, but was unsuccessful. (Mie Note: Shinju-chan isn't scary.)

"Okay, so, this is what we have so far, no da," said Chichiri as he pulled out a long piece of paper, "Waltz, no da?"

"Iie," said Tasuki.

"Flamenco, no da?"

"Iie."

"Ballet, no da?"

"Iie."

"Jazz, na no da?"

"Iie."

"Tango, no da?"

"Iie."

"Rap, na no da?"

"Iie."

"Pop, no da?"

"Iie."

"Matte, those are types of music, not dances," said Miaka.

"Well, you dance to them don't you, no da?" She nodded. "So they can be dances, too, no da."

"Salsa? Two Step? Swing? Zydeco? Country Western? Polka? Slam?"

"Iie, iie, iie, iie, iie, iie, iie."

"Well, we're out of options then, I guess... hmm..."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" Everyone looked up at the sound of a very loud and girlish scream.

"Not again!" Mie wailed. The there was a lound "umph" and as the dust cleared, a girl with very ruffled black hair in Chinese cloths laid sprawled out on top of Mie.

"Anzu! What th' hell 're you doin' here?!?"

_Mie: Heheh, what a terrible cliffhanger! I hope you don't DIE!!!! Muahaha!! Heh, join me for the next chapter, IF YOU DARE!!! Everyday Defects: "You're Not Taking the Seriousness Seriously, are You?!?"_


	4. Defect Four: You're not taking the Seri...

**You're Not taking the Seriousness Seriously, Are You?!?**

The girl got up and dusted off cloths, totally ignoring Mie's cries for help and breath. (Mie note: sweatdrops and "Why?!?" exactly am I writing this?!?)

"Oh sure," she said. Nice way to say 'Hi,' to an old friend who's just gotten here! Nice manners you have..." And she grumbledy-grumbled to her little self until she noticed she was standing on me. "Oh... heheheh... gomen ne."

"No problem," Mie said, squished, "I'm getting used to it." Chichiri looked down and they both sweatdropped.

"So," Rei-rei said, "_you're _the famous Anzu."

Anzu blinked. "How'd you know my name?" she asked, looking more carefully at the other Tasuki-centered **black-haired** girl. "Who are you, anyway?"

"I'm Rei-rei," she said.

Anzu fell over. "N-nani?!? I thought you were... dead!"

"It's funny, don't you think? Life, I mean. One day you're living the life with a hot bandi- er- _sophisticated friend_ and the next you're eating dirt." Everyone collectively sweatdropped. (Mie note: Hmm... there seems to be a lot of that going on... sweatdrops I did it again... damn...)

"So," Anzu said, "When I was at your grave, who was the person speaking to me?"

"Me," Rei-rei said simply.

"YOU?!?" she said, eyes wide open. "How?!?"

"Well, you see..."

"This is gonna take a while, isn't it," Mie muttered to Shinju.

"Yup," she replied.

"After I was rescued by the nice old lady," she continued, "we thought it would be a good idea to visit my grave. "So," she said, "when we saw you there, I just HAD to reply. We were in fits of laughter! You can't believe how funny it was!!!" Everyone sweatdropped.

Anzu just looked at Rei-rei, anger written all over her face. "NANI?!?" She walked over to where Rei-rei was, face turning purple.

"Aheh," Rei-rei said, backing away from an Anzu that was now surrounded by black chi. "Ahh... someone... help me... please..." Rei-rei twitched.

"Eh," said Mie, "I think is has gone far enough..." She got up and walked between the two girls. However, they didn't seem to notice her until it was too late. The product was an Anzu – Mie - Rei-rei sandwich. "Ack," she said, out of breath, "Someone... oh gods... I think something just popped."

Several minutes later, everyone had caught their breath and thigs were relatively peaceful, with the exception of Rei-rei and Anzu staring venomously at each other.

Tasuki's stomach growled. He sweatdropped. "Eh... what's for lunch?" he asked.

Reai-reai and Anzu both shot up immediately. "I'll make your lunch!!" They said in unison, then glared at each other.

"You shouldn't! You'll just poison, _my_ Genrou!" said Rei-rei.

"I will, will I?!? Well, at least I don't eat dirt! Besides, _you'll_ be the one to murder him! You only want _my_ Tasuki because he's on of the shichiseishi and you want power!"

They walked into the kitchen, quarrelling and hitting each other and pulling out each others hair. Shinju stayed behind. "Shun'u-kuuuuuuuuuun!!!!" she said. "Now that they've gone, we can get back to being a couple!" (Shinju Note: - hearts) A giant pole thingy – hair tie thingy shot it the room and hit Shinju on her head. Shinju fell backwards and fainted in the ever-present Tasuki's lap.

Rei-rei ran in the room, infuriated. "GET AWAY FROM HIM!!!!!" she yelled, positively, negatively furious.

Tasuki sat there, twitching, eyes wide. "Help... me... gods..."

_End Chapter Four._

_Oh gods, I know it was a short chapter, but, really, I have writer's block. sweatdrop Aheh, well... what did ya think?_

_To Gemeni-san: Thanks for joining the ED crew! - Is this post good enough? (please don't flame me)_

_To Emiko-san: Chapter four! Yatta! -_

_Shinju: Well, the next chapter will be... interesting... cowers in fear And I seriously don't get this- for some reason, Miaka hasn't appeared... oh well, not like I'm complaining. evil grin On the next chapter of ED (only, I'm better than Mie-chan): "Defect Five: The Officially Un-Official Dumpster Truck and the Evilly Evil Hairball?!?" What th' hell?!? twitches_


End file.
